a different world

Today I worked a shift at St. Paul's Hospital. Working; nursing; just always gives me a little wake up call. A change in perspective. A reality check. And most every day an overwhelming thankfulness for the upbringing I had, and the life I have now, and obviously for my health. Seeing sick people and agonizing families is never easy. With often bleak outcomes and grieving children trying to understand what is happening, lots of things that don't seem fair. But being at this hospital itself is also just a huge contrast. Just parking my car such a short distance from my house actually and feeling like I am in an entirely different world. Boarded up windows on houses that are falling apart. People I pass and am thankful its still light out and I can't help but avoid eye contact with as I walk to my car. I passed a house with 5 children under 5, two babies screaming hysterically sitting in their strollers on the front lawn at 8:30 pm. I can't help but well up with tears as I think of my babies smiling face and knowing he is fast asleep at this time probably dreaming of cheerios and toy cars. I think of the news lately and it seems like babies and small children keep dying at the hands of their parents. I just heard today about some of the issues with and sadness of the foster system in this province. I go to work and although sometimes heartbroken, I am always thankful. I also somehow feel good inside for being a part of good in whatever little way it is. And it also trivializes so many things that often have me fretting. Its good for me. I like my job.